Retail

For anyone who gives a shit I work in a shop. A shop in a music venue. I won't reveal the name of said venue because I might get shafted but you probably know anyway if you have any knowledge of me.

Now, I don't mind this job, it drags a bit and the hours are long but it's better than what I used to do at said venue and I get a lot more responsibility. However the one thing that really makes the job difficult is customers. Ironic really as they're pretty central to the whole thing. So I'd just like to vent some gripes here in a advisory fashion for anyone looking to browse the shop in the near future...

Firstly, if you pick something up to look at it, fucking well put it back where you found it. Not at the other end of the shop, not next to where you found it, put it exactly back where you found it. If you don't, you're just fucking ignorant. I may have nothing better to do but it does rather take the biscuit having to tidy up after you like some nursery school spawn.

Secondly, if it's approaching 11pm (i.e, when the building closes), don't fucking amble around the shop as though you're doing your morning's shopping. I actually have a home to go to, as do the rest of the staff, and would quite like to be in that home on time. In all liklihood I will have been stood in that shop since the early afternoon and I'm quite eager to get the till cashed up and the shop closed down. At the moment the security barriers are broken so in fairness it does look like the shop is open all the time but you'd think that perhaps at a time so late in the evening you'd have the fucking courtesy to ask whether it's still open. Not just assume that I'm there to hang around like a twat whilst you umm and arr over some kid's toy for half an hour. I'm only on the rota until 11pm and I think that's pretty fair. Once it's gone half 10 I'm starting to close stuff down. Pick want you want, pay for it and leave. Don't piss and moan when I'm busy cashing up and you can't buy your meagre purchase of a postcard and a pencil. Also it would be useful if customers had a better understanding of how tills work. For example, I CAN'T PUT YOUR THINGS THROUGH THE TILL IF THERE'S NO MONEY IN IT AND IT'S BEEN CASHED UP.

Finally, don't assume the shop is just there for you. You may think it's a wonderful idea for us to stock some shite like bouncy rubber nail clippers but in reality you're the only person that has ever, and will ever, ask us for such a thing. By all means suggest it but don't have a go at us if we say we don't stock it. It's not a travesty, it's a simple case of supply and demand. In all liklihood, your shit idea won't make us any money. If you want it that badly, buy it on the internet.

Contrary to what this blog entry may suggest, I am actually very polite and friendly towards customers. I want to keep my job in the end. What isn't obvious is my raging internal monologue.

Thankyou.